I was never really good at
Telling you
What was on my mind
And I don’t think you were really
Ready for that either
Here it goes:
Somehow
You meant more to me
Almost instantly
Than people I’d tried for years
To keep around
And I guess I took your presence for granted
I should have said
How much it meant
When you stayed up all night
With me
When we traded clothes
When you told me to eat
Even though you, too,
Were living off adrenaline
(I should have told you
To eat with me)
I intended to sing to you
One day
I was beginning to trust you
But I never told you
I never found the words to say
A wound was all that was left behind
After you were gone
And I wasted time hinting
That I missed you
When I should have been saying
I was sorry
And I understand now
Why you didn’t
Say goodbye
Why I’m part of a time
You’d rather forget
I’m sorry I assumed so much
By the time I realized
You wouldn’t always be there
And I would need closure
Or just a goodbye
something
It was too late
All this time
And I still don’t have the words
Don’t think you want them anyway
Thanks for coming to me
In dreams
When I needed you
Thanks for the times
You called me back
Im sorry all I focused on
Was when you
Didn’t answer
If you ever needed
Anything
I’d give it
But I know you’d never ask
So I try not to think of you anymore
My mind can bury a memory
I guess avoidance isn’t healthy
But neither of us
Were ever really
Any good
At coping.